When we moved out to the bog land that is The Pants Ranch we were so excited. Surely the groundhog watching would be ten times better. There would be millions of creatures to admire and make up conversations for! But we have been very sorely disappointed, until now.
This is Rocky. He (she?) is the new love of my life. Rocky came to us about month ago when he showed up on the deck mid-morning looking for scraps. He was stumbling around after what I could only assume was an all night bender. Seemingly, unable to find his way home wearing his drunk on berries goggles. I was all, "Hey there little butter sweetness! Go home, it's past your bedtime!" and Rocky took one look at me and scampered off. That's when I saw that there was something wrong with Rocky. His pelvis is messed up. When he tries to run forward he ends up running sideways and tips over. He has a limp. He is a reject raccoon. Probably ostracized from his peers. Maybe even his own mother! He is on his own and he is just the smallest little pumpkin. Not even a teenager raccoon yet.
Of course this made us fall madly in love with him. Madly. Maybe it's because I am done having human babies? Maybe it's because we love an underdog? Who knows? All I know is that I want to love him. Jacked up pelvis and all. And he loves me too. I mean, it has occurred to me that what he actually loves is our kid's habit of throwing his snack food around the yard. I see that it's possible that he doesn't actually love me at all, but rather the Cheezits and toast that Pants leaves for him. And while I know that feeding wild creatures is a bad idea, I just don't know that I can take that away from him. And yes, his sad little face forced my hand and I might have left some day old spaghetti out in the yard for him. Don't judge me! Because he's not your typical raccoon. He's disabled and that makes it impossible to get into the dumpster with all the other raccoons. And it also makes him a sweet lil baby. Sure, a sweet lil baby that would bite my face if I got too close, but a sweet lil baby none the less. So there you have it. There is a new baby in our life. His name is Rocky and we love him. We just do.
PS: I need an intervention or a new baby.