Mama: Zero, Mr. Pants: A Million. That's the scoreboard a dear friend presented me with recently when I told her about my day. It's funny how a perfectly good day can be swirled down the toilet by a suped up combo of tired, sick mama and a jazzed (super bizzaro jazzed), over stimulated, over tired Mr. Pants. The picture to your left is what happens. I didn't think to snap the pic until after I had cleaned up an entire roll of unrolled toilet paper (I think I should be proud of his first TPing experienece. Sigh.) My child had gone bonkers all. day. long. There was peeing into food (please let the thrill of this be replaced very soon by something less horrifying and vomit inducing), the eating of a refidgerator magnet (I'm not even kidding) and going into the fridge about 17,068 times on a seek and destroy mission. He ate ketchup straight from the bottle and ran laps through the house (Do I even need to tell you he was naked? You just assume that now, right?). He practiced an ancient form of Karate known only to him and tried to hurdle his sister everytime I wasn't looking (as a result, poor Miss Plum spends more than her fair share of time in the excersaucer safe zone. Bring on the Guilt Pie!) He threw the couch cushions off the couch and used them as his very own cushion swimming pool and he smeared peanut butter all over the windows. I'm am completely serious when I tell you that I found myself swaying with my eyes closed in the hall way. I was also humming. And gently tapping my knee into the wall rythmically. I know that I looked certifiable. Because at that moment in time, I was. Now you may be asking yourself, "Couldn't you stop him? What were you doing? Does he have ADHD?". To that I submit, "Um, no.", "Running interference and hoping for the best." and " No but I am starting to suspect he may be a two year old with sensory issues."
So after a long day of manimal-ing through his life he begins to saunter and hum (classic "I'm tired" cues from Mr. Pants) and falls asleep sitting up naked on the couch. For many reasons (the biggest of which being that I want him to still like me when he's old enough to read this himself), I can not post that picture. But I did get one of the ketchup debacle because eventually my best sanity keeping option is to snap pictures for evidence. It also helps to look back and see that while I may have been ready to run screaming from the house after duct taping my sweet angel to the floor, we lived through it to start over. And we always start over. Some days are good, some are bad and others are great, inspiring and straight up awesome. It's the latter that helps us get through the former. My parenting rule of thumb is that when we are in the muck and things look to be completely hopeless, they aren't. Eventually they change. You just have to ride it out. Stay calm, move forward. Ride it out. At some point everyone falls asleep. Because his battery must recharge. Eventually he will power down. No one (not even a sensory seeking two year old) can stay awake forever.
Oh, Hello! I'm Colleen and I do the writing and mama-ing around these parts. I'm glad you're here. I hope you stick around .
Because I like you.
Breastfeeding, attachment parenting, DOMESTIC VIOLENCE, SPD, food allergies, Unitarian Universalist, community, ECZEMA, sensory processing, SUNDAYS PEARL, Parenting, co-sleeping, Action, Advocacy, traditions, CLOTH DIAPERING.